Tuesday, June 15, 2010


"Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it" - Charles Swindoll

On Sunday I was in full-on enjoy-the-outdoors-mode.

Grab the blanket-in-a-bag, grab the dog, grab a towel and make a high speed switch into the leopard print bikini (first public outing) to rush over to the park for a nice summer lay out.

Get to the park, enjoy the sun, enjoy the clouds, wait, more clouds, wait, now the sky is just white….

Okay. So, retreat. Zip the blanket back into bag mode, toss everything into the bag, corral the reluctant dog, and high-tail it back to the apartment. Less than one hour round trip time. Fine, still got to get some sun in, still got some outdoors and nature in, so the jaunt wasn’t a total loss.

Get ready to go to run an errand or two. Grab the keys, go to grab the wallet….

Wait, where’s the wallet?

Check the bag, check the purse, check the counter, no wallet.


Check the bag, check the purse, check the counter, check the bed, check the fridge. Still no wallet.

Grab the umbrella, run outside, run to the park, check the grass. Still no wallet. Kick the wet grass. Still no wallet.

I have never, ever lost a wallet. Or a phone. Or keys. It is completely outside the realm of possibility for me that this has happened. I am stunned. I can’t stop thinking about it. I’ve exhausted all possibilities for where it might be. It’s clearly gone. I must have dropped it somewhere in the back and forth and just not realized it. My thoughts are just tumbling over themselves. I look, again, although in a studio apartment there is only so much looking you can do.

Finally I suck it up and make the phone calls: debit card, credit cards. I go to run my errands and begrudgingly buy a new monthly metrocard. As I feed the bills (since I’m now on a cash-stash-only basis until my new bank card comes in) I am thinking: Dammit. Dammit. Dammit. And when the machine tells me it only gives a maximum of $6 change, and I have to go back above ground to find someone to break a $20, I’m cursing myself again. Who uses cash anymore? Damn useless stupid paper!

I barely keep anything in my wallet (it’s more of the card-case variety with the bare minimums, and I am notorious for only ever having a few bucks in cash on my person at once). The money isn’t really the issue: it’s the pride. Did I seriously just manage to lose my wallet on a 3-block walk to the park and back?

Sunday night passes. I’m still kicking myself about the lost wallet.

Monday passes. I’m thinking: hm. Well, that wallet was really tired and used anyway. How long have I even had that thing? Maybe it’s time to get a new one anyway. Hm, maybe I’ll check and see if Balenciaga has a cute little wallet. I mean, I never lose them, so I might as well spend a little on one that I actually like….

Enter some online window shopping at work. Shopping can put a bright shiny mask on even the most annoying of situations. Suddenly I have gone from being out one wallet to having a world of new-wallet possibility opened up before me.

Monday night passes. I’m not quite so annoyed. I mean, what did I really lose? A grimy old Coach card case (that I didn’t like) with barely anything in it. Yep, time for a new change. It’s not such a big deal, anyway.

Today (Tuesday) morning I’m bringing the recycling downstairs. I run into my super. “Hey! Hey I found your wallet in the hallway the other day….”

I smile, nod, effusively thank him. And suddenly I have back in my possession a wallet that I no longer want.

Sigh. Talk about the grass is greener…

1 comment:

  1. oh, yeah, the thought tumbling moments...they're pretty exciting. and ch-ch-ch-anges, such good and unsettling things they are. i feel a squeeee of excitement coming on to get to read your writing!